March 22, 2026

I’m currently on a Southwest flight to Phoenix, Arizona. The highs are in the 100s, so I’m self-electing into dehydration and a sunburn. I’ve also never been one for the desert. There’s something unsettling to me about the open expanse of muted reds and browns. Why am I going to Arizona, then, you ask? Truthfully, I don’t have answers to most questions as of late. I simply find myself wanting a change in scenery.

One of my best friends died of cancer in early February. Her name is (was?) Caroline. I’m not interested in writing extensively about her death, but I’m certainly interested in writing about how her life molded my own. I’m also a Christian, which makes this all feel equally horrible and holy. I told a friend the other day, “I’m consumed with a strange feeling saying this out loud, but I’ve felt more like myself since Caroline passed.” Is it possible I am more myself now than before? Perhaps a shred of the mystery of this strange, awful ordeal? 

Caroline died on a Friday morning at 8:21am. I left the hospital around 9:45am and found myself with one consuming thought— I didn’t eat breakfast. My friend Emily was in the car with me. We typed “Kolaches Houston” into Google and found ourselves at a timeless Texas staple— The Kolache Factory. Oh yes, the room temperature, white bread buns filled with mediocre breakfast staples. Imagine it like a handheld plate of American diner breakfast. Caroline would have despised everything about a Kolache. I ate a couple of them anyways. Turns out no one gives you a manual about what to do immediately after your best friend takes her last earthly breath. 

So, here I am. Writing. I refuse for this all to become an extensive obituary for Caroline. Instead, I shall do as all writers intrinsically do— write for the sheer thrill of doing the thing you feel created to do. This is how Caroline felt when she picked up a camera, and boy, was she made for it. Six years ago she encouraged me to pick my camera back up after a long hiatus, inviting me to second shoot a wedding with her. I haven’t put the camera down since. I hope the same for this pen (well, keyboard) of mine.

Thanks for reading along, friends.

xo,

Anna Grace (you can call me AG for short)